We hear the terms financial security and emotional security often in the recovery program. We all struggled with these concepts when we first decided recovery was our choice. We experience a lot of financial fear and insecurity when we first get sober, and it makes sense that we are confused as to how to get rid of this. It isn’t something we need to stress on, especially in the beginning, however. When we have straightened out some aspects of our lives, and we have physical time sober, we can start the process of recovering financially.
How it Works
The term financial security is first seen when you are on the fourth step of the twelve steps. What this term identifies is the amount of fear we have attached to our finances and pocketbook. We most likely struggle with finding a job at this time, or we owe many people money. Once we are on the fourth step, we can write down all the ways that we have engaged with this fear. The delusion is that we aren’t making decisions based on this fear when, in reality, that is what we mainly do. We are afraid of how the rent is going to get paid, how we will be able to pay for our car, groceries, and just living expenses in general. We may have racked up a lot of debt as well. What are some ways to relieve that fear?
We must write them all out first and foremost and read them to another person that we trust. We have come to the realization that all the ideas and ways we have used in the past to solve this problem haven’t gotten us to the best solution. The next step is acknowledging that these solutions won’t work. We want to live a straight and narrow path, and we want to be useful to our spouses or family. We can list the people we owe money to from this fourth step, and after doing the next few steps, we’ll reach the ninth step. With the sponsor’s help and guidance, we can start making those financial amends to the people that we have screwed over. It sounds scary at first, yet it is not an overnight process. It also won’t be all the money we have.
Paying Our Debts
It sounds counteractive, however, paying people and institutions back is actually the secret to financial freedom. We may think that this will cause us more pain and fear, yet it actually relieves us of the fear itself. Some helpful tips that we have run across are paying back the people we owe money to. We can also donate money to either a twelve-step fellowship or some sort of non-profit organization. If we see someone who is homeless that needs money, we should help them out if we can. If someone that we know is new in recovery doesn’t have any money to eat after a meeting, pay for them. If we know someone struggling with finances or gas, give them some money and help them out. Start paying for family dinners or just any small gesture that isn’t grandiose and is realistic. We have found that the more we live in an altruistic way, the more we receive. There are a lot of people that have helped us, especially in the beginning. Paying it forward can feel scary in the moment, yet when you see that you have helped someone, it feels like it was worth it. We start to realize that we get promotions at work, or our pockets are filled with more money than we thought we could have.
Once we start taking those actions, we can implement the power as well. We can’t do this by ourselves, and the true freedom from financial fear is coming to the realization that none of it is yours in the first place. It is all a result of a higher power at work in your life. The material world and material things seem necessary/appealing. However, what is truly necessary is having enough money to have shelter, gas, food, and expenses for any dependents or family members. Of course, a higher power wants you to be happy, joyous, and free, so what will occur is you will never go without. If we put our trust and reliance upon this power and continue to do the footwork, then the anxiety and fear don’t need to be experienced. Meditation about this can also put things into perspective.
Rinse & Repeat – When Necessary
Once you are at a place where the fear returns, it is helpful to do that process again. Write down those fears and take a look at what it is that you’re relying on. That job you got was a result of a power working in your life that placed the perfect opportunity. It may not seem that way at first, yet very quickly, it is noticed. This process can help you come to terms with the idea that you are not alone in this, and you will not be let down. We are always in our own way. If we don’t listen to that intuitive voice or the people that can help us, we will experience that insecurity.
If you’re ready to start the journey of recovery, Choice House can provide you with the structure you need to get going. As addicted people, we’ve often fought for years to assert our independence. However, when we get sober, we often find we can’t do it on our own, and we need to reach out for help. We offer a variety of different treatment options to suit your needs. You can decide whether 12-step recovery is the correct path for you or you prefer a different approach, you’ll find the compassionate, experienced care you need. Choice House will be behind you the entire way. Call us today at (720) 577-4422 to learn more.